What to Say When You Talk to Yourself
Ebook

What to Say When You Talk to Yourself

Sh
Shad Helmstetter
258 Pages
1986 Published
English Language

In What to Say When You Talk to Yourself , Shad Helmstetter reveals how your internal dialogue shapes your beliefs and actions. By becoming aware of and actively changing your self-talk, you can reprogram your subconscious for greater confidence, success, and happiness—proving that the words you say to yourself truly define your life.

📖 Short Summary

🧠 What to Say When You Talk to Yourself is a groundbreaking self-help book that explores the power of self-talk —the internal dialogue we all have running in our minds—and how it directly shapes our beliefs, behaviors, and ultimately, our results in life.

📘 Written by Shad Helmstetter , a pioneer in the field of personal development and neuro-programming, this book was one of the first to bring attention to how our inner voice influences everything—from confidence and motivation to success and happiness.

“You believe what you tell yourself. Whether it’s true or not.”

Helmstetter argues that most people are unaware of their negative self-talk and how it sabotages their potential. He provides practical tools to identify and reprogram limiting thoughts with positive affirmations, helping readers take control of their mindset and create lasting change from within.

This book has helped millions transform their lives by learning to master the conversation they have with themselves every day.

 

🧠 Core Message

🔹 You become what you believe—and your beliefs come from what you say to yourself.

 

Helmstetter teaches that:

  • Your subconscious mind accepts as truth whatever you repeatedly tell yourself.
  • Negative self-talk creates fear, doubt, and failure.
  • Positive self-talk builds confidence, clarity, and success.

💬 “The words you use to talk to yourself shape your world.”

 

🧩 Key Themes & Insights

🧠 1. The Power of Self-Talk

Self-talk is the constant internal monologue that interprets your experiences and shapes your perception of reality.

📌 Key Ideas:

  • Most people are unaware of how much they talk to themselves negatively.
  • This internal voice can either support or sabotage your goals.
  • The good news? You can change it.

🧠 Important Insight: “Your mind doesn’t argue with what you say to yourself—it believes it.”

 

🎯 2. How Beliefs Are Formed

Helmstetter explains that your beliefs are not innate—they’re learned through repeated messages, often from childhood.

🧠 He reveals:

  • Early programming comes from parents, teachers, peers, and media.
  • These beliefs influence everything you do—even if they’re false.
  • Reprogramming begins when you take control of your self-talk.

💡 “You were programmed once. Now you can reprogram yourself.”

 

🧬 3. Negative Programming Holds You Back

Most people carry decades of negative programming that limits their potential without even realizing it.

🚫 Common Forms of Negative Self-Talk:

  • “I’m not good enough.”
  • “I’ll never succeed.”
  • “I always mess things up.”

🧠 Important Lesson: These aren’t facts—they’re habits. And habits can be changed.

 

🛠️ 4. Reprogramming Your Mind With Affirmations

Helmstetter introduces the concept of using positive affirmations to overwrite limiting beliefs.

📝 Effective affirmations:

  • Are short and specific
  • Use present tense (“I am…”)
  • Are repeated regularly

🧠 “You can replace fear with courage, doubt with belief, and failure with success—just by changing your self-talk.”

 

🧱 5. Build Confidence Through Repetition

Confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it’s built through consistent, empowering self-talk.

💪 Helmstetter says:

  • Repeat affirmations daily to build new neural pathways.
  • Speak to yourself like someone you love and respect.
  • Over time, your brain will accept the new message as truth.

🧠 “Belief follows repetition.”

 

💬 6. Words Create Your Reality

One of the central ideas of the book is that:

“You live what you speak into existence.”

🧠 Helmstetter explains:

  • Language shapes thought.
  • Thought shapes belief.
  • Belief shapes behavior—and ultimately, your life.

🧠 “If you want different results, start saying different things—to yourself.”

 

🧘‍♂️ 7. Take Control of Your Inner Voice

Instead of letting your subconscious run on autopilot, Helmstetter encourages readers to consciously direct their self-talk .

🛠️ Tips:

  • Replace destructive thoughts with constructive ones.
  • Monitor your inner dialogue like a coach.
  • Don’t just react—choose your response.

🧠 “You don’t have to believe everything you think.”

 

🧪 8. Scientific Support for Self-Talk

Helmstetter backs up his theories with insights from psychology and neuroscience.

🧠 He explains:

  • How the brain processes language and emotion.
  • The role of the reticular activating system (RAS) in shaping focus.
  • Why repetition rewires the brain over time.

🧠 “Neuroplasticity proves that your brain can change—if you give it new input.”

 

🧩 9. Identify and Replace Limiting Beliefs

A major part of the book focuses on identifying the source of negative beliefs and replacing them with empowering alternatives.

🔍 Steps Include:

  • Write down your common negative thoughts.
  • Challenge their truthfulness.
  • Replace them with positive, believable statements.

🧠 “You can’t stop a negative thought—but you can replace it with a better one.”

 

🧭 10. Use Self-Talk to Guide Behavior

Just like athletes, performers, and top achievers use self-talk to stay focused and motivated—so can you.

🎯 Helmstetter shares:

  • How to use self-talk before important events.
  • How to reinforce confidence before difficult conversations.
  • How to stay calm under pressure.

🧠 “Elite performers win mentally before they win physically.”

 

📈 11. Create a Personalized Affirmation Program

Helmstetter offers a step-by-step method for creating a personalized affirmation plan tailored to your goals and challenges.

📝 Guidelines:

  • Focus on key areas: confidence, relationships, career, health.
  • Use simple, powerful language.
  • Practice daily for maximum impact.

🧠 “Consistency turns affirmations into action.”

 

🌟 12. Live Consciously, Not Reactively

The final takeaway is about living consciously—choosing your thoughts instead of reacting to old patterns.

🧘‍♂️ Helmstetter encourages:

  • Daily reflection and awareness.
  • Monitoring your thoughts like a mental fitness trainer.
  • Choosing thoughts that serve your goals—not your fears.

🧠 “You are not a prisoner of your past—you are the architect of your future.”

 

📌 Final Thoughts: Change Your Self-Talk, Change Your Life

What to Say When You Talk to Yourself is more than a self-help book—it’s a guide to rewiring your brain for success, happiness, and personal power .

As Helmstetter writes:

“You are constantly talking to yourself. The only question is—who’s in charge?”

If you’ve ever felt stuck, doubted yourself, or struggled with low self-esteem, this book gives you the tools to take back control of your mind —and your life.

Whether you’re an entrepreneur, student, parent, or anyone seeking greater confidence and clarity, this book offers a clear path to transformation—one word at a time.

Publisher Berkley Books
Publication Date 1986
Pages 258
ISBN 978-0425109950
Language English
File Size 6.1mb
Categories motivational, Personal Development, Psychology, Self-help

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